Gibtown Runner tagged me last night and asked that I write 6 words that define my life.  After thinking about it for a while today, the title of my post is what I came up with.  

A few weeks ago I was having problems with keeping a positive attitude while running. Someone recommended a book to me called Perfect Weight America by Jordan Rubin.  While I am not worried about my weight (to the contrary, I LOVE food, especially while I am training…) there are some good sections in there about getting rid of the negative so you can focus on the positive. One of the exercises is about pushing the stress out and, I think, literally visualizing that happening.  Some of the other books I’ve been reading have also talked about positve self-talk, and the power of visualization and mind/mental training, and I think there is a lot of truth to them.

So when I say keeping positive things in, this is what I mean:

  1. In = in my heart, in my mind, in my life.
  2. In includes people, attitudes, and thoughts.
  3. Negative out means getting rid of negative thoughts, attitudes, and yes, if necessary, people, if they can’t or won’t try to understand me, and my attempt to change my life.  (I have come to realize that some people don’t want to be happy and can’t or won’t understand those who are.)

While a lot of my progress has come over the past few months that I’ve been writing this blog and finding it easier to express myself, to be honest, this new attitude or way of life has involved a lot of work on myself over the past few years. 

A good friend of mine, whose opinion I highly respect, explained to me one method of letting things go, or as I will call it, pushing the negative out. There’s “your business,” “my business” and “God’s business.”  Now I’m not necessarily religious, so you could also call that third portion, “the universe’s business.”  If someone says something to you that hurts, you can allow that hurt to grow, thereby making it “your business” or you can try to make amends with that person, or try to understand their actions/words.  If they choose not to understand you, or even try, that’s “their business.”  You can’t control anyone else, their thoughts, or their actions, only your own.  Everything else is “God’s or the universe’s business.” It’s harder to put into practice than it is to say, but I find it helps me get through some things.

So here goes – if there’s anyone out there, past or present, who thinks I’ve hurt them, either real or imagined, I am sorry.  You can choose to try to understand, or not.  That is your business, of course. I just cannot and will not allow hurt or negativity in, anymore. That’s my business.  Negativity out.

Making time for my husband, for my family and loved ones – that’s keeping the positive in.  Writing this blog – that’s keeping the positive in.  Trying to do a good job in many ways at work – that’s keeping the positive in.  Running on good (and yes, even the bad days) – that’s keeping the positive in.  Memories of my grandmotherdefinitely keeping that positive in my heart.

I am not trying to be a polyanna, or anything like that, I realized that life is not perfect. However, I am finding that negativity only weighs me down and makes things so much harder, in every facet of my life.  Tonight, I refused to let negative thoughts take root within my brain while I ran 6.07 miles in the pouring rain and afterward, I felt such a sense of accomplishment, both in the physical and mental senses.  Two months ago, I would never have been able to push myself to do that, or to keep going in such bad weather, (think thunder and lightning too).  I credit much of the improvement to a change in perspective.  Bill said he was so proud of me for running outside of my comfort zone. (Again, positive, in.)

Chris tells me that now I must tag 5 other folks’ blogs and ask them to do the same. So here’s who I choose:

Kaity at A Lazy Girl’s First Marathon

Lisa at Discovering the Meaning of Stonehenge

Tamara at Eat My Dust

Karen at Running While Pathetic

Kara at Between the Miles

Chris, thanks very much for tagging me.